Get Them Trousers Off !!

One more example, if one is needed, of the world going completely mad. "Dutch fans were told ( or ordered in some papers) to remove their trousers on entering the stadium at Stuttgart on Friday for their match against the Ivory Coast."

I first saw the report in a Spanish paper over the weekend and doubted my own attempts at translation but now the English press guardian have got hold of the story.

Unfortunately no pictures can be traced but it appears that about 100 ( or 1000 depending on who you read ) Dutch fans, determined to enjoy themselves even if it means wearing all-orange outfits, dressed up in their festive gear and set-off to watch the game. Unfortunately in their excitement they had forgotten to order their trousers from Heineken, that well-known garment manufacturer and instead had made the mistake of ordering their trousers from their local brewery, Bavaria.

Strange name for a Dutch company you might say but nevertheless as soon as they were spotted by the local Sponsor-Watchdogs the burly Stadium Bouncers were called and fans were forced to remove their trousers, deposit them in a waste-bin and watch the game in their hopefully stylish underpants. Presumably Kevin Kline is not a world cup sponsor!

Its not reported how large the label featuring the name "BAVARIA" was on the aforementioned trousers, m'lord, but it was obviously large enough to be spotted by the Watching Public relaxing at home in front of their TV's who would presumably all rush out to their local off-license in a desperate search for some Bavaria beer.

The next time I'm in some god-forsaken bar and I ask for a beer and get the response "blah-blah or Heineken" I shall swiftly check the label on my trousers and the size of the bloke by the door before insisting on a cool bottle of blah-blah.